Month: September 2016

Facebook said, “Good Morning, Laura. Stay dry in Central Square. The forecast is rain.” We shall see Facebook, we shall see. 

Today was lovely. I was on my way to the Adirondacks when I stumbled upon Erie Canal Village in Rome NY – More like GHOST village!  Do kids in school even learn about the Erie Canal? Do they know Low Bridge (15 miles on the Erie Canal)? It was so sad that nobody cares anymore. But it did make for some pretty pictures. 

Just after the picture below, I torqued every muscle in my body. I had sandles on in tall grass. I thought to myself that there could be snakes – in fact that could be one by my foot instead of a stick. And then the stick slithered over my foot. 

I drove through the Adirondacks starting in Prospect and ending in Lake George where I stumbled upon a jazz festival while listening to jazz! After driving around and around I deduced there was no way I could park Bird so I moved on. I went to The Silo in Queensbury to get apple cider donuts. There is a lady making one batch after another all day, every day, with a kitchen aid mixer and frying them in small batches. I’m not a huge donut fan, but these are pretty spectacular.

I love, love, love the Adirondacks. I would live there seasonally in a heartbeat! There are endless forests filled with such a variety of beautiful trees. Some are just about to burst into fall colors, a few overachievers were already scarlet and amber and burnt orange. Others are evergreen trees more typical to the forests I grew up around on the west coast. Scattered throughout were lakes of all sizes and shapes. Then there were the little towns – but wait – they are called villages and hamlets! And they look like villages and hamlets. How friggin cute is that?

All around the bigger lakes are beautiful old country homes with a rolling back yards that end in the lake. Some have docks. Some don’t. But pretty much every back yard had a couple of Adirondack chairs sitting next to the water. Just like a picture.

I drove through one village where the entire village was having a yard sale. Every home and every business had stuff out for sale. It was all I could do to keep from stopping and buying a bunch more junk. Did I mention the yard sale I hit up yesterday? I like going on Fridays when the good stuff is still there. I saw one that looked interesting so I flipped a gigantic bitch and pulled up. I ended up with a glass deviled egg plate AND a free dozen farm fresh green eggs. I bought an old wrought iron hummingbird on a stick with a loop I assume a feeder will fit. It’s cute. But, my score was a 1940s red Scot towel paper towel holder in original condition. All for $7! I looked up the paper towel holder on eBay… They are going for $150! Woo Hoo! Plus mine hasn’t been painted or cleaned. Pristine.

I did stop at a righteous farm stand for apples and corn and green beans. 

Then I headed into Vermont. Now that’s a state I could see living in. It is something really special. I don’t think I have ever in my life seen a cuter town than Woodstock Vermont. Wowza! I had every intention of going to a spider web farm in southern Vermont. However, due to the lack of camping sites in Acadia national park or Bar Harbor, I wanted to shake a leg up there by mid Sunday to see if I could snag a site from someone who has to go back to work or school. So no spiderwebs. I’m hoping to drag Larry there when he is here. It’s not really that far… The guy harvests actual webs and somehow preserves them and sells them. I want. Bad. 

I made it to Portsmouth New Hampshire to stay the night and then it happened… Beeping. From the refrigerator. NOOOOOOOOO!!!!! It beeps every two minutes for 15 seconds which means that the light is on inside. It’s not. It’s malfunctioning. So I have to move everything back into the ice chest and go get a bunch of ice. I just bought some frozen food which now gets tossed. The worst part is that it’s Saturday and no repair shop will be open until Monday. And even then who knows if they can get me in. 

So I fumed and vented to Larry for a while and then decided to reboot and breathe. I went back on the national park website and what do you know? A campsite opened up in Acadia national park the first week of October! I snagged it. Rather than going up before Larry gets here, I’m going after. This week I’ll sightsee the hell out of New Hampshire, Vermont and maybe Boston – and try to get Bird repaired. 

What am I going to do tomorrow? I am going to see the Atlantic Ocean for the very first time. 
Onward ♋
PS. Haha Facebook! Dry as granny’s cooter! No rain for 17 days. 

Did you know Amy Adams is 42? I have no idea why I found that surprising but I did. Her first acting credit is in 1999 meaning that she got a late start. Just a little tidbit from me to you. 
Harry Connick Jr has his own talk show. I love him but predict an early cancellation. That’s a tough nut to crack. Another lil nugget. You’re welcome. 
I’m still in upstate New York taking my time going up and around or maybe through the Adirondacks in to Vermont and then Maine. I’m a total fool. I have been planning to stay in Acadia national park but can’t get a reservation. Six months ago they told me I didn’t need one but now they closed their biggest campground for sewer repair. Shit. Literally. So, I’m going to have to stay in a campground in Bar Harbor near all the bars and restaurants. What a nightmare! Just kidding! 
I take quite a few prescriptions and had to plan with my pharmacy to get refills on the road. I use Kroger (Fred Meyer / Smiths). I went in and specifically asked if there were Kroger pharmacies in NE USA and was assured there were. They gave me a list of stores. Guess what? There are none. I had to transfer all of them to Walmart. After that was done they told me that when transferring them to New York that’s it. No picking them up in another state. What a hassle. For you interstate travelers who take meds, be SURE to plan refills better than I did. Fortunately I’ll be back in eastern NY in three weeks or so and can pick up another round. 
I saw the best car ever today. 

I drove through the Finger Lakes area today and it sure was pretty. It’s all little farms. I’m early for fall colors but I can tell it will be drop dead gorgeous. 

Onward ♋

I miss my Dale Cooper! 
I believe today will be indulgent. I need to rest. Driving 14 straight days – even for fun – is exhausting. I can tell I need to rest by how grumpy I am. There is NO reason to be grumpy on the vacation of a lifetime. So, today I rest. I’ll clean Bird and do some laundry (muwahahaha haha hahahahaha… not bloody likely!!!!!!) Maybe take two naps!

Lone wolves need to follow certain protocol when traveling. I mean, we are alone. Nobody to share the driving, help with decisions, etc.. Don’t get me wrong, traveling alone is my favorite way to go. I love it. But, we have to realize we must not push it. Once we get tired we make poor decisions and likely miss something we should have taken the time to see – or a stop sign. I try to never drive more than six hours a day. And, I think even that needs to be on a sliding scale. The more days without at least an 18 hour break, the fewer hours you should drive. 
So what if you stay in your RV for an entire day napping? It’ll make you enjoy tomorrow so much more. This is the first time I’ve gone 14 days straight and after some rest, I realized I need more. I was really tired. BRAIN tired. I’ve absorbed so much. 
I have done enough lone wolf traveling to know myself and pack entertainment. Wifi can not be counted on, ever. Nor can a TV signal. I’m happy to hike easy trails and wander every day. But, when I need down time I want specific things. A cool bed, good book and a binge worthy tv or movie series. I finished one of the books I bought on the road – The Clinic by Jonathan Kellerman. It was good. An easy who-dun-it. I’m currently finishing up Stephen King’s Mr Mercedes trilogy by reading End of Watch. It’s so good and weird and sci-fi!

I also downloaded The Wire, Season 1 from Amazon Prime onto my iPad. I know it’s supposed to be one of the best shows ever. Those are big shoes considering The Sopranos, Game of Thrones, Breaking Bad Twin Peaks and, of course, Sex and the City (whoop!). I’ll let you know my opinion. I just finished S1 ep1. So far I won’t die if I don’t see another. 

So as you can see, I keep quite busy even when doing nothing at all! Again… Luckiest Girl Alive

Onward ♋

Well it was bound to happen and last night it did! When I left Pittsburgh yesterday I had planned on seeing the Pennsylvania Dutch and NFL Hall of Fame. Pennsylvania sucks at campgrounds. There was nowhere to stay and those stops were unplanned – so instead I headed north to Erie. Then at 8pm the sleepies came on and I did the only thing I could… Slept at a rest stop!!! Ugh. I knew it would happen sooner or later. Stupid trucks idling all night. I did sleep some – the diesel fumes probably knocked me out!

The best part about sleeping on the side of the road was that I was on the road by 5:30am. Found a good breakfast and headed for Niagara Falls. First I stopped to see Lake Erie. It’s really big, you might call it great – It looked more like an ocean. You can’t see the other side. A little secret about me… I like taking rocks out of bodies of water. I don’t know why but I do. I have little piles of them around the house. I got one out of Erie. It’s pretty ordinary. I’m weird. 

Then, out of Pennsylvania (except for Thomas I didn’t care for western Pennsylvania) and on to New York. 

I must say that Niagara Falls are spectacular. The volume of water rushing is truly shocking. I have newfound respect for anyone going over that in a barrel for sure! The view is better from the Canadian side but alas, no passport. I’m an idiot. I had all year to get mine renewed and watched the Bachelor instead. #regret I chose not to go on the boat ride. I don’t do well in crowds where I have no control (anxiety) – and those boats were crammed! Plus I was tired and wanted to camp. 

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I had located a free campsite that looked interesting (freecampsites.net) so I plugged the GPS coordinates in and two hours later I was there. It didn’t look safe so I drove down the dirt road and turned around. Literally that fast there was a truck full of dickhole dudes yelling at me that I can’t camp there. Ok already. It looked like I good place to get attacked (prolly by those toothless fucks) and I had already turned around to leave. Fucking assholes. Did I mention that this was in the middle of nowhere? Where did they come from?

I was really, really surprised by the number of confederate flags I saw flying in upstate NY – a lot. Also Team Trump signs. No Hillary signs at all. Didn’t the north fight the confederates? I’m confused. I guess dirtbags are dirtbags are dirtbags. 

So, I’m back in a pay to play campsite. I’m going to bed early and sleeping until 10am at least! And… Although the forecast was for rain, not a single drop – 14 days and counting. 

Onward!

I’m the luckiest girl alive. Just kidding – but that IS a good book. I am fortunate to be able to follow my dreams. I dreamed of traveling the USA – and here I am. I’m also lucky for the little things. For example, I went into see Thomas at lunchtime. He refused to let me eat lunch. He wanted me to eat dinner – his specialty. So I drank a couple of bloodies (good and horseradish-ey) and hung out in the coffee shop reading on a comfy leather couch. But my iPad started to die – so I went outside to my house to charge it. How friggin nice is that? My house was parked on a Pittsburgh street! I expected trouble for parking there but got none. 

I turned on my tv and it worked! I watched Dr. Phil on JonBenet Ramsey, drinking a beer and waiting for dinner time. It’s a rough life for sure! I do think that brother may have killed JonBenet – he’s super creepy. I am loving my O2Cool rechargeable fan. It’s a lifesaver because it’s hot and humid out. 

Something weird. Well, something else! I have not hit rain a single time while driving. One night it rained while I slept, but I’ve hit nothing but sunshine. Today is day 13. I feel my luck fading (my luck is fadin’ – ode to Kanye). Not that that is a bad thing. I LOVE rain and driving in the rain – but mostly camping in the rain. Las Vegas doesn’t offer a lot of pattering rain calmness. It’s either 110 or briefly dumping. Every time it rains I run to get in Bird to enjoy the rain – but it’s always over in two minutes. 
I returned to The Abbey for dinner so hungry I could eat the ass end of a dead rhino. At the bar they had prosecco on tap! It was amazing. My appetizer was grilled shrimp over white beans which were really good. It’s Thomas so I expected it to be salty – but it really, really wasn’t. It’s perfectly balanced between the sweetness of the shrimp and white beans and aggressive seasoning with a hint of heat. The white beans are made from scratch with rosemary. It was a big dish of food for an appetizer and scrumptious. I are the shrimp before I remembered to photo it. 

Next Thomas brought me shepherd’s pie – made with lamb. It was also very good and not what I expected. It had a layer of something like scalloped potatoes on the bottom and the traditional mash on top. Plus a tangy yogurt sauce that cut through the richness. It was so nice to eat Thomas’’ food again. He needs to move home to the west coast. 

Before I left I introduced Thomas to Bird and, more importantly, Lola!

That was my entire day. I headed out of Pittsburgh at like 6pm with no real destination. We’ll see. 

Last night I fell asleep to TV and slept so hard. I didn’t wake up until after 9am (6am Vegas time). When I woke up there were cars parked all around me – like close – one foot. I didn’t wake up. They HAD to hear my snoring! Haha. I went into Walmart for beer, ice and hopefully flip flops. Nary a pair in the store… “Winter is coming.” Sucky suckhole! 

Then I went to Skyline Chili. Cincinnati is famous for its chili – they serve it over spaghetti (2 way) topped with cheese (3 way), onions (4 way) and kidney beans (5 way). The chili has a unique seasoning – lots of cinnamon and allspice (think sloppy joe without all the tomato). I ordered it 4 way. 

Hmmm. So I got a pile of lukewarm overcooked pasta in a bowl with very little chili (maybe a half cup) and a teeny bit of grated onion. Then two cups of ice cold shredded cheese on top. Literally the most cheese in the whole world – like a softball. It is so weird. And not in the best way. Oh well. But the locals seem to love it – the place was completely full of people eating piles of cold shredded cheese. It sticks to your teeth

I headed for Pittsburgh but when I stopped for diesel I noticed that Bird was so covered in bug guts that flies were swarming in for the feast. She was gross. So I found a truck wash and gave her a Bird bath. The washing guys robbed me by charging $40 but I guess it’s cool because they got my bike too. Did you see how she sparkled in the sun? Pretty Bird. 

On a side note, this truck wash was creepy. It’s a low concrete pull through. You drive in, a bunch of dudes (six) wash your rig. When I pulled up nobody was to be found. Then they all piled out of a dark doorway. This was a small building and that area wasn’t the office. What the hell were all those guys doing in what I presumed had to be the bathroom? Circle jerk? Gross. But, I have Lola to protect me. She watched their every move. 

I’m staying in an expensive ($45) RV park tonight because I need to clean up before I go into town to see Thomas! I can’t wait to check out his restaurant – but I’m more excited to see his face. Thomas came to work for me first in maybe 2008 and then again in 2011 (I fired him the first time – oops, my bad). He’s a great chef and guy who I’m glad to still be friends with after all these years. 

I decided that after Pittsburgh I am going up to Lancaster to check out the Pennsylvania Dutch. Then, I’m going to the NFL Football Hall of Fame in Canton, Ohio before heading up to Niagara Falls driving along Lake Erie – and then over to Maine. I have to find a spider web farm in Vermont that I read about. 

On the way from Ohio to Pennsylvania I crossed through West Virginia. It shocked me. I admit it’s been 40 years since I studied a US map but I didn’t realize I was that far east. But, there it was. I am impressed by how far I’ve come. When I look on the map it’s surprising to see my location. And, I’m on eastern time! 

When I was a kid my family didn’t normally do big vacations… With one exception. In 1976 my mom and dad loaded me and my two sisters in a mint green Oldsmobile with only two doors – if I remember correctly. We drove. Literally. We drove through nine states in ten days. I always think about that trip when I travel. I would’ve bet a lot that I would never do that again. Ha! I just hit nine states in FIVE days! Really, really not the same. I barely touched some states on this trip. And I wasn’t getting licked by my sisters while my parents burned cigarette holes in the roof liner of the Olds!

Today I started in Missouri and then hit Illinois, Indiana, Kentucky ending in Ohio. Early this morning I went down to the waterfront in St. Louis to see the Gateway Arch. You know I always thought it was white? It’s stainless steel and super shiny. It’s really big but I thought it would be bigger. It’s literally right on the Mississippi River. The river was huge, muddy and full of logs and gunk and stuff. I stuck in my toe in solidarity with Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn. But it was pretty gross. 

I went into Louisville and thought I should at least drive by the Brown Hotel and see if there was any chance I could park my rig. No problemo! It’s after tourist season. So, I went on in and had a Hot Brown and a bourbon cocktail (a Kentucky Derby). The bar was lovely and food was delicious. It was very rich and I only ate about half. However, that was on my bucket list, too. I wasn’t planning on checking it off – I want to go to the derby one year. But then I thought it might be easier now without the crowds. Check!  It wasn’t a total win – I ate shit outside on the sidewalk in front of a bus full of people. And broke my most comfy (but old and crusty) flip flops. Shocking, eh?

I took a scenic drive along the Ohio River and looked at gorgeous estates. Ones with winding drives, rolling hills and huge trees. I couldn’t get good pictures because the road was tiny and full of impatient drivers. And then on to Cincinnati. I have to say that Cincinnati is the prettiest city I’ve seen on this trip arising in the distance. Tomorrow I think I’ll check it out. I’m right on schedule so it’s time to fuck that up for sure! 

I’m staying in, you guessed it, a Walmart parking lot. I have to do some cutting to afford all my fancy food! But, I got channels on my RV TV! Yippity! Football! (Stupid Cowboys). 

That’s me! I’m the blue dot… Can you believe how far I have come? I guess so, considering I’ve driven all day for two straight days. I woke up in Nebraska and before I landed in St. Louis, I hit two other states. Four states in one day (not the easy, 4 corners way)! The highway took me into Iowa. I stopped to take a picture of the sign because my step dad Brian is from Iowa! Yay Iowa! It’s tough to take pictures of state line signs – often you just can’t stop. 

Then, because it was so close, I popped into Kansas. Literally in and out! But that counts! Then on into Missouri (no sign). If Nebraska was cows and hay – Missouri is trees and green and more trees. I bet Missouri has no forest fires – but lots of floods. Lots of waterways. The only dry things I saw were old cornfields. 
Missouri also has very fast drivers. They all drive at least 15 miles over the speed limit. Several passed me on double yellows even! And I was going the speed limit. So far Missouri drivers win for most aggressive. I have a feeling New York and New Jersey drivers are gonna make these guys look like fluffers!
I was going to eat BBQ in St. Louis tonight but at my crawdad pace it became evident I would be pretty late. So, I pulled over outside Kansas City and looked up “BBQ near me” on Google. I came up with a place nine miles away off the highway called Porky’s (http://www.porkysblazinbbq.com/). It was pretty awesome. Real basic… order at the counter, cash only, bus your own tables. I ordered a lot and now my (still working) frig is stocked! I loved the place because they had signs everywhere telling the customer what to do – and NOT do. It reminded me of myself at Jam! I love a good sign. 

I’m staying the night in the Hollywood Casino parking lot outside St. Louis… Again, free! Tomorrow I am going to visit the Gateway Arch and take my first ever gander at the Mississippi River. In the words of Clark Griswald, “the Mighty Mississip, the Ole Miss, the Old Man…Deeeeep River, my home is ooover Jordannnnah!””

Then I’m off to Cincinnati. My only decision is whether to go through Indianapolis or Louisville. I think Louisville because I can check off both Kentucky and Indiana before hitting Ohio. Thankfully it’s less than six hours away. I’m sick of driving all the live long day. Haha. Hard life!

So. About the mammoths. It is sad that so many perished in the sinkhole. However, the story is pretty interesting. The archeologists have discovered only male mammoths – and mostly teenagers. Zero females. The experts believe that these mammoths were most likely unruly boys in their herd – and were thus kicked out. By their grandmother! Granny mammoths were in charge of the herd in the mammoth world. So, these wild boys were sent off on their own and saw what looked like easy food around the hot spring that had opened up – and in they went. Duh!

I love that the women were in charge and not dumb enough to go for a swim in a bottomless pit! Ok, that’s all about the mammoths. Obviously it was one of my favorite stops. I even bought a ridiculous safari hat!

Today I drove. I have seen a lot of cows in my day – a lot. But, I’ve never seen anything like Nebraska. Hay, corn, soybeans and COWS! That’s it. I’ve never seen so much grass. And it’s green! At the end of September! Nor, have I ever seen such fat cattle. Wow. Nebraska cows eat very well indeed. 

That’s about it except for two things… I found the only bridge of its kind in the United States. It’s held up by a single pin and has held since 1932.

And this grossness. 

I am in Omaha and after seeing fat cattle all day I decided I needed a steak. I went to the place where Warren Schmidt had his retirement dinner in About Schmidt – called Johnny’s. It’s been in the same family since 1922. The prime rib was ok, the bartender was awesome but the place was depressing. It smelled like crushed dreams and mildew. 

I’m going to sleep now… In a Cabela’s parking lot. This is my ninth day on the road and I’ve spent $50 on campsites! Not too shabby – that’s why I justify eating steak on occasion. 
Note to self… I have more to say about the mammoths. 

You know when you just know something? In your bones? I knew there was something wrong. I stopped twice for confirmation and got none. Those were lazy, lazy people who didn’t want to deal with it – because there was something wrong!

I had one flat and another with weird bumps that were making a noise when I drove. For 1300 miles I knew there was something wrong. Today I got two new tires and Bird’s flying smooth. Woo hoo! Now the real vacation can begin. Off to Devil’s Tower and maybe some debauchery in Deadwood!